The ultimate gift-giving alignment chart

We're beyond "for him" and "for her" gift guides by now, right?

Georgia Dixon
Digital Content Editor
Read More
Published on December 02, 2021
3 min read

It's 2021. Surely we, as a society, have evolved beyond the need for boring (and frankly heteronormative) gender-based gift guides? Would we not be better served by a gift guide based on something more universal than gender? Something like, say, Dungeons & Dragons character alignment?

It's simple. Take this quiz to find out your - or your gift recipient's - alignment (if you don't already know), then discover your perfect gift below.


Lawful good

Donation to charity

Neutral good

Gift card

Chaotic good

Something over budget

Lawful neutral

Socks or undies

True neutral

Something regifted

Chaotic neutral

Cold, hard cash

Lawful evil

Lord or Lady title

Neutral evil

Lynx Africa gift set

Chaotic evil

Glitter bomb

The best gifts based on your (or your giftee's) D&D alignment

Lawful good

Charitable donation
Because giving money to the community is good-er than giving money to one person, right?
Starting from
Any amount

Lawful good folks are compassionate and always see the good in people. However, they're also bound by a strong sense of duty, honour and justice. If you're one of these goody-two-shoes, you're probably one of those people who says Christmas isn't about gifts - it's about spending time with the ones you love. We're not saying you're wrong, just a bit basic.

Your gift is something wholly altruistic, like a donation to charity. Everyone will be simultaneously impressed and annoyed by your act of generosity.

Neutral good

Gift card
Sure, it's a bit of a cop-out, but let's be real - no one says no to a gift card.
Starting from
$5

Neutral good people are kind of like lawful good people, but without the smarmy sense of superiority. They're the kind of people who give money to homeless people and don't post about it on social media immediately afterwards.

They're also the kind of people who give (and like to receive) gift cards instead of actual presents. It's not out of laziness - they simply think it's the best gift.

Chaotic good

Something over the set budget
The kind of people who ignore the agreed-upon budget and gift the new iPhone or something equally elaborate.
Starting from
$1,199

Chaotic good people prefer to follow their consciences rather than the rules, but they're still inherently good people who always fight for the greater good, even if it happens to be in a roundabout kind of way.

They're the kind of people who go over the $100 gift limit and buy their giftee the new iPhone, or, somehow, perhaps even a PS5. Just don't ask them where they got the money to afford such a lavish gift. You won't get an answer.

Lawful neutral

Socks
Boring, but dependable, just like lawful neutral people themselves. At least get some fun socks.
Starting from
$19.95

If you're lawful neutral, you were probably one of those kids who used to rat out classmates for bringing banned toys to school. (I'll never forgive you for getting my Tamagotchi confiscated, Aaron). You do what you're told, even if it's not necessarily good for you or the people close to you.

Your go-to gift (or the gift to give to a lawful neutral mate) is something boring but inherently useful, like socks or undies. At least try to make it fun by getting some Happy Socks or MeUndies that actually have some personality. Unlike you.

True neutral

Something regifted
True neutrals don't care enough to have planned a gift in advance, but they're not going to show up empty-handed either.

Ahh, true neutrals - the human embodiments of the colour beige. The most inoffensive people you'll ever meet and are usually pretty chill.

If you're one of them, you probably leave gift-buying to the last minute, so you'll just regift that present you got last year and never touched again. If you're buying for a true neutral, you officially have permission to regift right back to them.

Chaotic neutral

Cash
Chaotic neutrals care not for gift-giving or gift-receiving. Just give them cash - if anything at all.

Chaotic neutral people are the best kind of people - and I'm not just saying that because I happen to be one. 

Just like true neutrals, you're not the most prepared person in the world. You're not lazy - you just have better things to do, like living your life. You're not even prepared enough to get a gift card, which at least requires some effort. You're just going to throw some cash in a card and call it a day. Or you might just bail on the whole gift-giving thing completely. You do you.

Lawful evil

Lord or Lady title
They only want power, so why not give them free reign over a 1sqft parcel of land?
Starting from
$60

The only thing a lawful evil wants is power, which makes gift-giving a bit of a challenge.

If you're buying for a lawful evil person, you've got to go for Lord or Lady title (and accompanying 1sqft plot of land). That's at least giving them the illusion of power. And if you are a lawful evil person, you'll probably buy a plot of land for your giftee, then buy yourself the surrounding eight plots so they'll always know who's in charge.

Neutral evil

Lynx Africa gift set
Yes, your Aunt who gave this to you every year between the ages of 13 and 17 is, in fact, evil.

Neutral evil folk see any gift-giving occasion as an opportunity to benefit themselves - even if it means gently (or not so gently) insulting the recipient.

Your go-to gift is something hygiene-related. A toothbrush, nail clippers, but more often than not, you go for the classic: a Lynx Africa gift set. Anyone who has given you a Lynx Africa gift set is neutral evil, no exceptions. They also think you smell bad.

Chaotic evil

Glitter bomb
The only gift chaotic evils deserve (and the only one they'll ever give).
Starting from
$19.95

I've yet to meet a truly chaotic evil person and I hope I never will. If you're unfortunate enough to know one, I have only sympathy for you.

The only appropriate gift for a chaotic evil person (aside from a referral to a good therapist) is a glitter bomb. It's probably what they're going to give you, so you might as well fight fire with fire.

Georgia Dixon
Written by
Georgia Dixon
Georgia Dixon has over seven years' experience writing about all things tech, entertainment and lifestyle, with bylines in TechLife magazine, 7NEWS and Stuff.co.nz. In her spare time, you'll find her playing games and daydreaming about good food, wine, and dogs.

Related Articles

Lenovo Yoga Slim 7 Pro OLED review
The Lenovo Yoga Slim 7 Pro OLED is a solid bang for buck option that...
Graphic of the Peacemaker TV show streaming in Australia
How to watch Peacemaker in Australia
The spin-off show for John Cena’s character from The Suicide Squad is finally here, and...
Excited woman in striped dress smiling at laptop
Speed test your Exetel internet
Speed test Exetel internet here.
Rainbow Six: Extraction/Quarantine screenshot
Rainbow Six Extraction review: More quarantine needed
After delays and a game name change from Rainbow Six Quarantine to Rainbow Six Extraction,...